Burnout

High functioning burnout is a hot topic these days and with good reason. In a culture that encourages us to do more, it’s easy to veer into “too much,” especially if you mean well.

 It’s easy to talk about the importance of rest when there are no kids, elderly parents, bills to pay, or other external things making a grab for our attention. But what about when those things are present? How can rest be achieved so we intentionally power down and not power up? The simple, but not easy, answer is with practice and boundary setting. In my profession, I encourage clients to place their energy on the things that facilitate their healing. For them (and me), it means resting.

 Tricia Hersey, the founder of The Nap Ministry, has a poem about all the things rest can be: “rest being real-life conversations, rest is a meeting with self”. When you meet yourself, you learn more about who you are, what you need, and what you value. The root cause of burnout is valuing who others need or want us to be. It’s overextending ourselves to prove our worth and value in society. But what’s really called for is rest.

 Our need for rest is part of the human condition and it’s crucial for survival. The theme of last year’s World Mental Health Day was ‘Mental Health is a Universal Birth Right’. But rest is a universal birth right too. It’s more than clickbait and hashtags. Rest is putting something into practice that can be quite challenging as it’s more than taking a nap or doing yoga. And the tricky thing is rest means different things to different people.  

 I’ve seen in myself and my clients that busyness is often a defence mechanism to help us avoid what’s going on in other areas of our lives. “Busy” is socially acceptable and of course useful. But if taken too far, it can be damaging not only because it can lead to burnout but also because it can seriously affect your physical health.

 What keeps us from resting is the feeling of shame. There’s a belief there’s something wrong with you if you need to change gears into rest mode. But there’s not. It’s normal, natural, and universal. And it’s a gift we give that not only helps us but our wider community. As someone in a helping profession, I know it’s tempting to overextend yourself for the sake of someone else but keep in mind this mantra: “It’s the community that holds us when we struggle to hold ourselves”. In other words, you don’t have to do everything, all at once, all by yourself. We are all here to hold each other, to take turns being the one who needs help. 

 Change begins with re-writing the narrative around the “booked and busy” culture that seems to be galloping across the social discourse. When we prioritise “booked and busy”, we run the risk of booking ourselves into burnout. Let’s make rest a priority and normalise switching off and stepping back - unapologetically.

How to manage burnout:

 Get familiar with the subtle signals like getting short tempered, snapping at loved ones, feeling fatigued.

 Right a short list of the things that help you decompress but haven’t had time to do.  It might just jog your memory towards the things you’ve forgotten to remember.

 Make time for play – this is so important. Not only does play release endorphins that come with doing something pleasurable it’s a way to connect back to what’s important too… your joy! It’s so easy to deny ourselves the very thing that provides balance and relief.

 Change the narrative do I need to do this now, do I need to catch every ball today.

 Check in with yourself regularly.  What is it that I need in this moment.  Sometimes it could be as simple as just stopping what you’re doing and taking a walk around the block.  If this isn’t possible then go to the bathroom and take 5-10 mins out.

 Breathe – not shallow breathing but conscious breathing.

 Asking for help isn’t always easy when you’re in a habitual rut, but this is where change begins. Start by asking a trusted friend or colleague to check in on you